What to Do if Your Child Gets a Low Score in a Test or Assessment
By Timi Alabi
I remember getting a low score in a particular exam in secondary school. I was absolutely terrified of being told off at home and facing the consequences, so what do you think I did? I used a pen to change the score to a higher score. That’s what fear could make a child do. By the way, I was a good girl for those thinking, ‘’My child is good, they would never do that.’’ Fear doesn’t discriminate. Fear could make a good child make wrong choices. Of course, my mum found out and I still got in trouble anyway.
So, before we talk about what to do, let’s start with what NOT to do when your child gets a low score.
- Avoid blaming and scolding
It could be quite disappointing for us as parents if our child got a low score in a test or assessment, especially when we know they are more than capable of doing better. In that moment of realisation, it is crucial to avoid letting emotions make us take actions that might instill fear, an unhealthy competitive mindset and a feeling of inadequacy in them. Some of the things we want to avoid saying are:
‘’ This is what happens when you don’t listen. I told you several times to spend extra time studying but what did you do instead? Play video games. I’m very disappointed in you.’’
This kind of response will only create a feeling of inadequacy in them. They may begin to believe they are not good enough, which could lower their self-confidence and esteem.
- Don’t compare them to others
‘’ What was Angela’s score?’’ ‘’What about Lucas’?’’ ‘’Was their score higher than yours?’’
These sort of questions will only create an unhealthy competitive mindset in your child. Comparison only breeds unhealthy competition and resentment. What difference would it make whether or not they had a higher or lower score than their friends? Rather than focusing on your child doing better than their peers, you should encourage them to be a better version of themselves. That way, the only person they are in competition with, is themselves; they should strive to do better each time than they did the last time.
- Avoid punishment-based motivation
‘’ If you don’t do better in your next test, you’re losing your TV privileges and your phone too.’’
This will only instil fear and shift their motivation to external rewards; they will want to do better to please you and to avoid being punished, rather than doing it for themselves and the benefit they will enjoy from hard work and success.
WHAT TO DO INSTEAD
Now that we know what not to do, Let’s look at WHAT TO DO when your child gets a low score.
First, we need to understand that there are several reasons why a child might get a low score. It isn’t always due to a lack of effort (even though this might also be the case). It might be because:
- They felt unwell during the test or assessment;
- They struggled with time management and writing stamina, which might mean they couldn’t get to the end of the test paper;
- They used an inefficient strategy such as spending more time on questions they found tricky rather than doing the ones they are confident with, first;
- There might be some sort of disruption in the room that hindered their concentration.
- They don’t enjoy the subject and therefore don’t engage with it as much.
These are just a few of many reasons, so it is important to unpick the reasons behind the low score.
A really effective way to do this is to help your child reflect on the whole process. Reflection is such a powerful tool that will empower them to take ownership of their learning and devise ways to overcome the challenges / barriers.
Here are some simple but incredibly effective tips:
- Start with the positives. For example, if they got 40% in a test, start by focusing on the 40%, rather than the 60% they got wrong. Ask them what they think they did to get those questions right. Encourage them to be proud of the ones they got right. If they got a high score in a different subject, celebrate that too and ask them to reflect on what they did to get a high score.
- Then ask why they think they struggled with the 60% they got wrong. Unpick this together. Encourage them to reflect on their studying approach, the test environment, their mood, stamina and speed during the test.
Is this a subject they like and enjoy learning? If not, why do they not like the subject? Do they find any particular types or styles of questions hard? If yes, why is this the case?
- Finally, ask them to think about what they might do differently in order to get a better score next time. Also ask what support they think they might need to achieve this goal. This will enable them take full responsibility and ownership of their progress and success without any unnecessary pressure. This thought-process will help them become a better version themselves. They might come up with ideas like start revising earlier, do a little but often, attempt the questions they are confident with first, requesting a quieter room with less people, using some online tools or physical materials for extra practice etc.
These simple strategies could shape your child into an independent, responsible and self-motivated learner.
Remember, every test score is just one step in their journey, not the final destination. With your guidance, they can learn, grow, and thrive.
